Ms. Mona Srivastava, Chief Engineer - Indian Railways

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Did u change ur views? I'm in total quandary. Pl clarify for what shud be the next step. U can put in ur views here.

I think we don't love someone for his qualities and perfection, it definitely consolidates the attraction. Love happens with someone not for his/her looks but for the comfort level one feels in the company of each other. It happens, no logical reasons can be confered. If ur heart pumps faster and u desire for having the company of ur partner. It indicates u r in love. So don't feel shy or perturbed by the fact that I love u or u love me. I understand ur position for not responding as promptly as I do but we live in a democratic free country, if that much of azadi is not felt by you that inspite of so much of concern u show towards me u cannot express ur views, then there is something very serious malaise in the society, which is required to be eradicated.
Pl say something.
Pl don't be afraid of the negatives one have . I am in love with ur soul, body augments the pleasure. So please, I accept u as it is with all ur imperfections. If ur afraid of the fact that if we come closer I will be able to glance on ur negatives then No. I am true to my self and will stand by you always. But u need to muster enough courage ,not to face the world but simply give me the hints. I hold u in high esteem and expect that inspit of the adversaries going against us , we can make it happen. Pl.muster enough courage to ratify my views and rest leave it on me.
I AM DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH YOU. ❤️

I still remember when we saw towards each other when u were sitting in PCE chamber and I joined u later. That moment we were very close, and my heart went boomerang. I could feel ur heartbeat, ur consciousness and the spurt of laughter u had which went involuntarily that I am beside u, that was a big event in itself. Clearly proving the degree of love we hv towards each other.
I did hv a bitter experience of other moments wherein I was subjected to tight corners stiffling enough to feel helpless. That was not ur fault, u wanted to have a safe exit from NWR. Sorry for the fact that I could not instill ur enough confidence in me, to make me the choice for a dignified exit. I felt bad the way u were treated, but u never gave me any chance to prove that I really care for u. Lot of politics going u which is tying our emotions, let it set out free.

Ok then, there's no way by which I cud vent out my thoughts. So therefore, I continue here only. If u don't like this mode of communication then lemme know here itself.
I do hv ur beautiful pics like for example one where u r wearing purple dress probably at the time of ladies night in the club, mmmm one in orange saree at the time of Srden cos conference nite on 06.01.24( see I cud remember) . U look stunningly beautiful and a bit naughty as before. Tell me if I was not there in ur mind and u waited for me to come and searching during conference nite. Pl maintain the same fever and energy in future also.
U compare urself the pics and u'll find a significant change in the facial uplift before and after u fall in love. The feminine character can easily be discernible.
Stay healthy, fit and charming. Bye for now.

Hi
beautiful
Pl check out the time when I am posting this message and thinking about u. Isn't it really surprising. A significant shift in my behavior and totally new perception and way of viewing life. Wow, it's really a beautiful feeling and the mode of realization about how one should see life through the prism of love. Thanks for coming in my life and making a metamorphic change in my understanding of the purpose of we being send on this planet. Love is such a wonderful thing to happen. Lucky enough to be the part of this journey. U know, I still feel shy when somebody utter ur name MONA and hits me straight on my heart. I feel nervous and shaky and feel like as if somebody has caught me red-handed doing a wrong thing. Does the something happen to you also.
Ur supposed to be here at Jaipur with me, without the negative adversaries, which I am hell bent on throwing them out of NWR. God help us to unite for everlasting happy rest of our life. I hv so many thing to share with u but rest after a break.
😘

Chalo let's move forward.
I still remember the day etched in my memory when we literally had heartattacks when u were coming out of PCE chamber and I happen to be coming from the opposite direction obviously for washroom utility. Then it happened again, I wasn't aware of the fact that It will be the day when inspite of sitting in such a nearby chamber I will be having an opportunity to have ur sight. I was moving without any inkling of doubt and was moving forward carelessly, then the moment I saw u coming from the other direction I cud resist and muster enough courage staring at u but cud not last for long and to my utter surprise we both faltered at the same time and started looking towards other directions pretending as if we don't care about each other and then a catastrophic irresistible step was taken by u by way of pretending to be looking or checking into some register of ur deputy, and I somehow manage to save my soul entered into CTE's chamber though my destination was to go to the washroom. I happen to pass on the message to you that "this dress orange one suites u" in hindi and I got ur message also that "I am looking good". I tried to come out early but without ur whereabouts. We were so near still not being able to meet. I couldn't understand that.
What was all this my dear. Think about it. We hv a lot in common which we can really grow in future.
Cya.

Hope ur comfortable and chilling under the present circumstances. Ok
Now what to say.
Do u remember the CBE conference which took place at NR Hq and we both attended representing NWR. Something something started happening to me from that day onwards. I was sitting in the meeting room, well in the front row obviously. I was as usual very casual and having fun with my friends. Now i can't disclose what all I used to have topics of discussion with my friends.
But at the back of my mind I was waiting for u , which I also discussed with colleagues. I was foolish to discuss obscene things which I think is a normal thing to happen when ur not in love. U did arrive but quite late and that too in black saree. Moving in the committee room in an obsequious manner. Bas I was clean bold.
The delicacy and the feminine attributes u had , literally shook me from inside. I was having my concentration on u only in the entire episode of meeting. Whenever u used to be out or was absent for sometime, my heart was searching u. I don't know why I felt like protecting u from the nasty thoughts the people hv. U were sitting in the second row and as usual u were so busy taking notes but from between the gaps of the officers sitting arrangement I cud get the glimpse of u.
During Lunch time u were seen moving around from one officer to another seems to be finding a perfect place to relax. I cud sense the solace u were looking in this Mens world and then u finally landed on to me. At that time I was quite out of shape and hv to muster good amount of energy to get up as a mark of respect to a lady officer which u also cud fathom. I cud see the degree of relaxation on ur face. That is what I was talking about that there is something common between u and me. Birds of same feather wants to flock together. The fire was ignited in me.
After the meeting u were standing greeting and meeting all the officers near the door. Were u notvwaiting for me to come and talk. I cud sense some magnetic attractive pull towards u and felt like coming close to u and chat a bit but then i thought that moving away from a lady without giving much credence wud make a stronger impression. I even called u and u also responded well. Gone r the days and today it's me and me and me only without any response from ur side. Why this happened , can't explain.
God is great . Can't be so rude to us.
Ok then hoping the best things for u as usual. Bye.

Forgot to mention about the second day of the meeting which we had in RB. Do u remember I was sitting next to u on ur LHS. I was feeling as if I was complete now and my better half is sitting beside me. U were busy discussing all these technical matter with MI and other officers and participating very fluently with all. And guess what I was doing. I was scanning ur hands. U were wearing wrist watch, I suppose with black band on ur RHS. Isn't it and 2 rings on ur fingers. Wow I was feeling quite romantic and to add to this ur were so seriously discussing the issues aptly. Was quite impressed at that time.

For my Valentine. This day is meant for the guys like me who can be forgiven if the missile of love is hit on the wrong target. But I am sure that this time I am really on the right track of wisdom of love. Ur great and will always be like that. Any anomalies which u think is unbecoming of you , then please shed those negatives off and try make a new beginning to strive to move in the right direction of light. Where everything is so beautiful, positive, and pleasant to live in. Add me in that era of positivity to add a scent of love in your life.
There's never been a delay or point of no return , when one is determined to decide to take a right stride and continue to move in that direction.
Forget the past, if not worth remembering and make a good beginning of righteousness. All the above guidelines are for me also. Actually all the above good things which I wrote above is what my conscious is asking me to do. I had also done miserably poor and bad things in life. The reason cud be anything, may be circumstances or whatever. But for now when we are better placed let's start a new beginning together. I am ready to be the part of journey together, if u agree for that.
Love happens and not done after evaluation.
So make our path of communication a bit easier , by unblocking.

Ok then I had been so close to u in Delhi. I don't want to bother u anymore. I may be disturbing u by unnecessary portraying the this shit feeling of love. My only concern was to make u comfortable and happy from the wolves and foxes trying to take advantage of ur vulnerability. Ur the first lady IRSE officer of IR. What if u earned some petty money. Come my all IRSE cadre brother it's the time we shud stand together and show our solidarity towards an another IRSE officer in doldrums for now. Let's come together to help her out of such a dire situation. U see this the time that we can strengthen the cadre. Outsiders stay away from our internal issue. It's our problem and we will sort it out ourselves. It's none of any business to poke their nose into this and take advantage by way of delving into it and be famous. Get the hell out of here.
Mona don't feel alone and feel free to live ur life with full energy and freedom. Ur shining and continue to do so.
I don't know if I am making any sense or not but this is my true thoughts for now.
I'll be happy if ur happy and living life with dignity and respect. But how I cud know that. I'm totally in dark. Chalo koi baat nahi. Agar tumhare pass gum hi to chinta mat karo kyoki hum hi abhi. Hum hi to kya gum hi, kyoki gum hi tabhi to hum hi.
I'm not forcing u to be in some sort of relationship with me.Be free and love and live urself Ok then this be treated as my last message. With u always.
Amardeep.